Impossible Words
by coolblue110
Summary: Kyouya enters school not knowing his world is to forever change. He has accepted that change must happen or the world will stop turning. But the change he is experiencing has made the world stop in it's tracks. KyouyaxHaruhi
1. Chapter 1

In an instant everything you ever loved could be gone.

Kyouya Ootori accepted the fact that when he got up in the morning his friends and family could all not be there.

But he never expected it to actually happen.

Kyouya Ootori awoke to a maid shaking him awake, telling him in a voice of mourning to get ready for school or he would be late. The sun was blinding and he could hear birds chirping a pretty song as he fashioned the buttons to his Ouran Academy uniform. The house was eerie quiet; the only thing he could hear was the quiet voice of his sister, Fuyumi. But even she sounded quieter than usual.

His footsteps rang through the halls as he made his way to the dinning area where his sister was visiting their father and looking down into a cup of tea while her tears salted it.

"Onii-san…" Kyouya approached his sister with a cool demeanor but felt the desperate need to comfort her rise up inside of him. If he only cared for one person in the world, that person was his sister.

"Kyouya-san, I'm sorry, I really must be off," Fuyumi kissed their father good bye before rushing past a dumbfounded Kyouya.

"Did she have a fight with her husband?" Kyouya sat in his place at the table and bit into a slice of bread. It tasted drier than usual, just like the atmosphere.

"No, but you must be off to school, Kyouya," for the first time his Father seemed genuinely awkward in his youngest child's presence.

Kyouya paused before answering his father with an "Of course."

All the way to school Tachibana was quieter then usual. He would usually ask how school was going or did he get a good night's sleep. This time he was silent and it was Kyouya who made polite conversation, asking how his wife and children were doing and having short answers given much like the ones he gave in his groggy state.

"Guard yourself, master Kyouya," were the last words Tachibana spoke before he rolled up his window and drove away, leaving Kyouya confused and with a strange feeling that he was missing something.

Something crucial.

As Kyouya walked up the path to the looming school he had grown so accustomed to in his three years there he noticed something was off. There were barley any students in the main court yard, which was usually bustling with hundreds of student's conversing with their friends. Now there were only a few who all looked sober and many were crying. Kyouya wondered if there had been a terrible world disaster, like the time the planes crashed into the towers in New York, America. There had been many mourners that day in the junior high building, and a few has lost foreign family members who worked their.

But what he found was something he had never anticipated.

As Kyouya entered the club room, it was a free day for teacher conferences; he saw several tear stained faces. There were heavy sobs coming from every direction but the most pronounced of all were the ones coming from a petite, short haired, brown eyed man, who didn't look too manly anymore.

Haruhi looked through the crowd around her as Kyouya entered the room. It grew deadly quiet as he made his way to the large mass. Everyone stared as he walked up, seemingly less disrobed and calm about the scene then anyone else.

"K-Kyouya?" Haruhi choked, looking up at the man in front of her. The twins starred up, and Kyouya realized this was the first time he had really seen them cry.

This was bad.

He noticed that even Mori and Honey, who had graduated last year, were standing to the side, both wearing expressions of withered old men who had experienced too much, though they were both only eighteen years old.

"Kyouya-kun, a-are you okay?" One of the girls looked tearfully at Kyouya, who looked questionably back.

"Of course I'm okay. What I'm wondering is, why is everyone else crying?" by the time he had finished his sentence Hikaru was on his feet and holding him by the collar, tears streaming down his pale face, his expression contorted with rage and grief.

"Your best friend dies and all you can say is you're fine, why isn't everyone else? What kind of sick person are you?" Hikaru's words pierced Kyouya and sent him into even more confusion.

"Huh? Who died?" Kyouya looked around at the shocked faces around him. He did a double take. Where was Tamaki? Knowing him he would have been the first in the club room to console the ladies.

"Kyouya…" Haruhi looked into Kyouya's eyes and slowly stood up, walking slowly towards him.

"Tamaki passed away last night."

And because of those five little impossibly spoken words Kyouya's life changed for ever.

**A/N Did you like it? I know it's not my best work and sorry for any typos because of word processor is deciding it hates me and won't work like it should. So please review because it makes me and my email box extra happy! **


	2. Chapter 2

"No he isn't," was Kyouya's instant reply, but all her received in return were looks of silent pity.

"I only just spoke to him on the phone last night. He was going out the dinner with his Father," Kyouya swallowed, knowing that he couldn't fight the crushing reality that was threatening to consume him.

"Kyouya-sempai, Tamaki was killed in a car crash on his way home from inner. His limousine was hit in the back, where he was sitting, by a drunk driver," Haruhi I looked down at her feet.

"I'm sorry, Kyouya-sempai."

Kyouya took in several shaky breaths before he was sure his voice wouldn't deceive him.

"Please excuse me," he said, turning on his heels and walking quickly and quietly out of the third music room, letting the door slam behind him.

He stood in the hall for several minutes, feeling as if he was in a dream. It hurt to think about him, but if he did not it seemed like he didn't care. He was trapped inside his own mind and the grief he felt for his friend was suddenly setting in.

"Damn it!" he cried, slamming his fist hard on the wall. He felt rage boiling u inside of him, he didn't feel upset at that moment.

He was angry with everyone and everything.

He was furious that nobody had thought to call him and warn him in advance that his best friend had died. Didn't he have a right to know?

It wasn't fair. It just wasn't fair. The life that had been taken was from the one person who had deserved it most of all. What were the last words his friend had spoken to him?

"I'll see you tomorrow! I have an amazing day planed!"

Kyouya now wondered what those plans might have been if he was still here.

Just as Kyouya was getting up to call Tachibana to come and pick him up the door squeaked open and the other Host members stepped out into the deserted hallway.

"We sent the girls back to their classrooms," Honey said quietly, looking down at his shoes. There were no tear stains on his face like the rest of them had, Kyouya guessed that he was either trying to be strong for everyone else as the oldest, or that he was still In shock.

"That was a good idea," Kyouya said, not saying it as whole heartily as usual. He slowly sank to the floor and put his heads in his hands, trying to sort everything out.

He felt a warm body next to his and, peaking between his fingers, saw Haruhi sitting next to him, holding her knees.

"I'm sorry Kyouya-sempai…" her voice trailed off as it cracked and he heard her chock back a sob.

"I talked to him just last night!" Kyouya said disbelievingly and felt the twins sit next to him and draped their arms around his shoulders.

"We know it isn't fair," Kaoru soothed.

Kyouya took in a deep breath and let it out just as shaky as it had come in. He was surprised that the next breath he took was hard to breathe because he was crying. He chocked back a sob the best he could. He had never let his friends seen him cry, seeing as it left him vulnerable and left the wrong impression.

"The idiot…" he felt his face become slippery and wet as he pressed his hands harder to his eyes.

The grief slowly started to set in.

**A/N Did you like it? I know, not the best of my work. Did I OOC Kyouya too much? I tried not to, but I'm not sure that I succeeded. Please review! **


	3. Chapter 3

_Haruhi stared out her bedroom window, thinking of how the next day would be fun for the girls. Tamaki had been telling her that he had magnificent plans for the next day and had been up half the night getting everything organized. It was probably some outrages cosplay, probably dressing up as French bakers and saying stuff like "The French believe in romance, and I want to be your romantic someone." Haruhi giggled as she turned back to her homework. He had had to hang up after telling her that since he was going out with his father to dinner. _

_Haruhi's own father had just walked in the door as her cell phone rang, seeing as they did not have their own phone line all of the calls came through her phone or Ranka's. _

"_Hello?" she answered calmly, she had seen that it was the twins calling and always answered the phone in the same way each time, not giving her mood away. _

"_Haruhi…" she heard Kaoru's voice on the other end, he sounded different. And not different in a good way either, it sounded as if he had been crying. _

"_Kaoru? Is everything okay?" Haruhi straightened up on her sleeping mat, now fully alert. She heard her father stop whatever he was doing so she could only hear Kaoru on the other line and her frantic heart beat. _

"_T-tamaki he...h-he..." there was a heavy sob from the other line and Kaoru's choked breathing. _

"_Kaoru, you'll need to speak more clearly so I can help you," Haruhi spoke seriously, set of edge by Kaoru calling the club's president by his first name instead of the nick name "Milord". _

_Taking a deep breath Kaoru spoke the last words Haruhi thought she would hear that night. _

"_Tamaki was in a car crash, Haruhi. I got a call from the intensive care unit from his father telling me he had passed away," another sob came from the other line as Haruhi dropped the phone, the screen flickering black. _

"_No….no..." Haruhi stared into space in shock for about ten seconds before she cried out and held her face in her hands, tears screaming down her face. _

"_Oh, God, no. Please don't let this be happening…" Haruhi felt her father keel next to her and rub her back. He had only seen her lose herself like this once before, and that was when her mother died all those years ago. _

_Haruhi felt herself losing control of her emotions and slowly let herself give into the heavy sobs that raked her body. _

Haruhi stared silently at a Kyouya she had never seen before. He was always the calm, cool; notebook keeper that she felt had built up a wall between them. She had never thought of him as a man who felt grief.

"The only one I ever knew who died was my mother…" Haruhi instantly remembered that one line that he had said many months ago, at the very end of his second year. They had been off to the side, not wanting to interfere with the twin's and Tamaki's teasing game.

_He must have felt something when his mother died. He was only three, he said, and it had been hard for him to understand why his mother was always being prodded with needles, as sharp as he was. When his mother finally did pass away, his sister was the only one to comfort him, both of his brothers and his father too absorbed in their own world. I hope that we're enough for him right now._

Haruhi now noticed that Kyouya had stopped crying and was standing up, heading in the way of the rest rooms.

"Wait! Kyouya! Where are you going?" Haruhi called after the dark haired man.

Kyouya stopped but did not turn around.

"I am going to collect my thoughts, call for a ride home, and talk to Tamaki's father. I want to speak at his funeral." Kyouya continued up the hall, rounding a corner, straitening his tie. He had forgotten his notebook in the club room but the remaining host members thought it best to let him go.

"I've never seen Kyo-chan this way before. I'm worried about him," Honey was standing next to Mori, still giving off the aura of an old man.

"Mitskuni, we have to be getting back home. My mother is waiting for us," Mori placed his hand on Honey's shoulder, who looked up at him and nodded. Still no tears were shed as they walked away.

"What should we do?" Hikaru groaned, holding his head in his hands. Kaoru looked at him and then at Haruhi.

"I don't know…" Kaoru buried his head in his brother's shoulder. "I just don't know…"

Haruhi looked out at the sunny grounds, feeling her world close in around her.

**A/N Did you enjoy it? It was Haruhi's perspective if you hadn't noticed. I'm sorry that this chapter was really dull and boring. I tried my best, but I might not have tried hard enough. And for those of you who have read "Moodswings" I'm writing another chapter! **


	4. Chapter 4

Kyouya sat at his desk, staring blankly at his computer screen. He was supposed to be writing his speech for Tamaki's funeral the next day, but for the first time in his life, Kyouya had no words that could describe his best friend.

Before his sudden death he would have put down things such as a bashful idiot who only wanted the best for everyone, even if he had a different way of showing it.

Now that he was gone Kyouya had so many things to say that he couldn't put down on paper. How Tamaki had been so full of life and had lived it to the fullest it could possibly go. How he had been the friend that everyone had always wanted but never realized they needed until said person was gone.

Kyouya finally closed his laptop, rubbing his eyes, and decided to wing it. No way could he start to write now. It was late and he was tired.

As Kyouya started to prepare for bed there was a knock at his door.

"Yes?" he asked, and stopped buttoning his shirt to watch as his sister peeked her head in.

"Kyouya-san, I was stopping by to see how you were doing, and I saw a young girl heading up the steps. She wants to see you," Fuyumi had on a worried expression. "She is the girl Fujioka-san you are always talking about, am I right?"

Kyouya turned his head towards his sister, feeling just as confused as she looked.

"She shouldn't be coming this far this late. It's dangerous," Kyouya buttoned his shirt once again and smoothed out the creased the best he could.

"She's in the lobby," Fuyumi whispered as Kyouya passed her.

"Sempai!" Haruhi said as he came in the brightly lit lobby. She stood, wearing a brand named t-shirt and slacks. She looked nicer then Kyouya had remembered. Cuter, in fact.

"Haruhi, what are you doing here? It's past nine and it's dark. Do you know how much trouble you could have gotten into?" Kyouya surprised himself at how strongly he felt about her safety all of a sudden. Sure, he had been worried about her antics just as the next guy would be, but this was stronger.

"Please don't worry; the twins are waiting for me in the car. We just stopped by if you wanted to go out with us tonight. The twins are forcing me to go out with them," Haruhi gave a forced smile up at Kyouya, who did not return it.

"Sure, I'll go. Let me just tell my sister," Kyouya turned and hurried up the hall to his room, where his sister was picking up his stray clothes.

"Kyouya-san, are you going out?" Fuyumi asked, stopping in the middle of lifting up a dress shirt.

"Yeah, does my hair look okay?" Kyouya took out a comb and brushed it through his hair, making it slightly neater than it was before.

"Of course, Kyouya-san. Now move! Go out with your friends!" Fuyumi ushered Kyouya towards the door where Haruhi was still standing, looking around at the expensive paint job and carvings that decorated the lobby.

Together they stepped out into the moist night air.

"Why are we here?'

Kyouya was looking up at the sign in front of him that read "Paintball area".

"We're playing paintball, Mori-sempai and Honey-sempai are already inside so hurry up," Hikaru marched inside with Kaoru dragging behind. He hadn't spoken a word besides a quiet "Hello".

Haruhi and Kyouya looked at each other, both not in the mood to play paintball but not wanting to object and make Hikaru's mood any more sour.

As they entered the paintball area they could see Honey and Mori sitting at one of the food court tables, only they were not eating as usual. They looked in deep conversation and seemed startled when the group approached.

"Oh! Well, let's start playing, then," Honey hopped off the high seat and smiled up at them. Haruhi saw that it wasn't all there. Honey wasn't his usual self, that much was clear.

"I don't think this fits…"

"Of course it does, that's the smallest size they have, Haruhi."

Haruhi was looking down at the vest that the man at the rental desk had given her; he had told her it was a size 2, but it seemed bigger than that. She shrugged and accepted that this was made for big chested girls in a size two, which she obviously wasn't.

The small group of friends were standing in front on a large blocked off area all dressed in protective gear to start paint balling.

"Okay men, Haruhi, let's move out!" Honey pointed forward and the rest followed behind, each running in separate directions once they reached the gate.

_This is pointless…_Kyouya thought as he ducked behind a tree. _Who the hell came up with this _game_, anyway? _

"Kyouya!" Haruhi ducked behind the tree next to him, and he looked down at her, seeing the urgent look on her face. She, of all people, seemed to be getting into the game, her eyes were all that needed to be seen.

"Kyouya, I need your help! The twins are after me! They just released all their power on Honey and went to reload! Mori's taking Honey out of the game for awhile, so we need to work together, okay?" Haruhi looked urgently up at Kyouya who nodded his head slightly, moving to stand in front of her.

"Stay behind me," he ordered as they ventured off into the unknown.

All was silent as they crept quietly behind and around artificial tress and bushes, hearing the occasional fake bird squawk.

"DIE!"

They were startled as Hikaru and Kaoru jumped from behind a tree and started to shoot the two with paintball after paintball.

"We're dead! We're dead! We swear! Please stop!" Haruhi raised her hand in surrender; her vest was seeping with bright colored splatters of paint.

The four friends started to laugh, but it quickly died out as they all thought of who would have been enjoying this outing the most if her were still here.

"It's late, we should all go out for something to eat and drop Haruhi at home," Kyouya looked at his watch, it was past eleven already. His sister would cover for him if he got home late.

"Yeah," Kaoru and Hikaru walked side by side to change out of their protective gear. The atmosphere had gone from cheerful to grieving in the maximum time of three seconds. It made Kyouya uneasy.

Was this really what Tamaki would have wanted his friends to do?


End file.
